18 Signs You’re In A Serious Relationship With Wine
I’d like you guys to meet my boyfriend, Obscenely Cheap Chardonnay.
1. You know who always makes you laugh? Wine.
2. You know who doesn’t blow you off at the last minute? Wine.
3. When things get awkward, or annoying, or really any type of way at all, there’s only one thing you like to turn to.
(Wine. It’s wine. The answer is wine.)
4. Wine can’t not text you back on a Friday night.
Because wine has no opposable thumbs.
5. Wine totally gets how you want to spend your time.
6. It brings out your resourceful side.
No corkscrew? NO PROBLEM.
7. And your confident side.
8. You find yourself getting wicked territorial about it.
9. And achieving things you never dreamed you could.
For example: downing an entire bottle of merlot in one sitting without breaking a sweat.
10. (Interrupting this post to show you a gif that is downright pornographic)
11. Wine is there for you even when you don’t believe in yourself.
12. And it loves you unconditionally.
13. Wine understands you even when you don’t understand it.
14. Sure, you have to ~buy~ it.
15. But you invest in it way more than you do in the rest of your life.
16. And you guard it jealously against anyone who might steal it.
17. Even though you can enjoy it in a group…
18. At the end of the day, it’s just you and wine.
And that is rad.
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